surreal but nice!

Just got back from a discussion with the chairman of a very very large conglomerate firm. the experience, of just being one of the faces in the crowd was amazing. seeing someone like him, up close and personal. however, any event is shrouded with beauracy, asskissing and ball licking (well, i just added that cause it rhymed). it was nice, nad i had to choose just this one great day to fall ill.
what i really admired, the humbleness of this great man. it really makes me think, leaders are made, they are born. humble, and so down to earth, it amazes me on these fronts. he actually came all the way to meet us, even though it was for a rather short time, he could have said he was busy, which i am sure he is, but to think he flew in, spoke to us, and flew back. i usually commute by car, not by a plane! WOW!

anywyas, i guess this is one day i will remember!

Rod Ney!

Just had my first corporate rape today!
it was done so smoothly, god! i knew it was coming, but did not want to think about i!
someone was to send me some files that i had to upload today( working in an IT Firm, you have to upload, download, in load out load, etc load etc!)
and he was like "i will do it over sunday, i promise!"
he did fuckall! unless he did work really hard to finsih it, fucker has forgotten to send it to me!
but the learning fromm this, i took me only 3omins to do, so i was wondering what was taking him so much time! gwad! these software companies! ridiclous!~

Capricorn Muses

Capricorn Muses

cells in blore

a take on my friends blog! http://raghu1981.blogspot.com/

Well, if you actually look into the larger relm of life, you will see that cities that have the highest number of "cellphone thefts", also have the highest floating population, low average age, and high levels of unemployment in the lower socio economic strat. now i am NOT pointing fingers here to say that they are doing it, or anything,all i am saying is that there are urges by people to go upto the level of comfort they see. i personally feel that the recent unrest in the city was a fitting example. the person who passed away was not a violent being. he advocated peace and in response, the rioting and damage caused not just to physical estabilshments, but the economy due to the closure of several insttitutions! appaling!
similarly, the university town of pune, the bastillion of shivaji, also one of the higest number of cellphone thefts. the best way to measure the cellphone theft rate is to measure the cell pohone sales rates.
cellphones are stolen, sold to first time phone users, the loosers go and buy legitimate phones.
just for them to get stolen again!
WELKOME.. to the moon!

arguments!

Well, its rather interesting, someone i know has started a blog, and they have asked for people to contribute articles etc etc, now what is the concept of a blog. what ever was intended, rock on!
work is going on all great. i wsa told i dont keep in touch with people. kinda sad. we live in a world where there are no longer any boundaries, but just borders. we have people but few friends, we care enough not to bother.
what have we all become? electronice ZOMBIES!
when was the last time anyone picked up a paper and pen and wrote. that was the reason i guess i started this blog!
i remember when i used to write muy assignments, my fingers used to pain, but now my whole hand gets screwed, thats RSS i think or repetitive stress syndrom! the computer is killing us, mind body and soul!

Adventures of Qwerty

Well, so we have our little programmer hero dude, Querty. working in one of them swank office buildings, centralized airconditioning (thats is standard nowa adays), free coffee, highly subsidized lunches, etcetc, but then whats his problem?
Qwerty fails to comply with the social norms. apparently there is something called Social engagement rules( or something on those grounds) that state that apparently, when in a public place / social gathering, there are norms that one needs to adhere to. sometimes i feel that ridiculus. its just saying that our society is getting faker by the day. if i am happy inside, i have everything going just great for me, why must i project that to the world? i just keep a straignt (appears sulking to others) face. now i see no reason to smile when i am happy, frown when sad, scowl when scowly and fret when mad. it defets the purpose that man is a creature who is supposed to have contorol over his emotions. there was once this story i read, i dont remember where, that there was this great sage meditating in the himalayas. and he was so great that the gods also used to come to him. now one day whilst he was wlaking in the forest, a bird shat on him, the sage got so angry that he was about to curse the bird when he bit his tounge and held back. he asked himself the question, what is the point of being such a great sage is i cannot even have control over my most basic emotions.
society has tuned us in to being things that we are not. if a person is happy today and not so happy tomorow, what is that person : manic depressive.
sad sad: depressive
happy bappy throughout - manic
why?

its rather ridiculs!
anywya,s c'et la vie!

Our Greatest Fear

I heard this in the movie "Coach Carter", but it really had an impact on me!
nice!


Our greatest fear is not that we are inadequate.
Our greatest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us.
We ask ourselves, "Who am I to be brilliant, talented, fabulous?"
Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God.
Your playing small doesn't serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking so that
other people won't feel insecure around you.
We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us.
It's not just in some of us, it's in ALL of us.
As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give
other people permission to do the same.
As we are liberated from our own fear,
our presence automatically liberates others."
-- Marianne Williamson, also often attributed to Nelson Mandela or Maya Angelou

confuseD!

i am really confused!
i really dont know what is happening in my life! seriously!
i cant ask for anyting more.
great family life, great job, great friends.... i have everything anyone can ask for! but im not happy. why? so many times i have tried to ask myself the same question! why am i not happy? what is that one butt plug that is making me look to life with a constipated look? i guess i am trying really hard to be happy. i know i can be happy, cause on the weekends, i am fucking extatic! packing my weekends with things, i cant ask for anyting else, but longer weekends! :-) i guess this would just become another rutt in the rat race! coming to work, doing some work, going bakc home! now thats a wheel of work!
i have sat and raked my brains! and have finlly concured! my job sux! really, the job profile and work is great! amazing to be precise! but i feel rather lost in my current company.
i am a pin in a haystack, going to be eaten by a cow! now hows that for the pin! considering if i dont do anytting, i am going to land up in shit! now that i feel is a career path!
i guess i have a yearning to start something! i think i will decide by this weekend if i will be continuing with this job or not!
well, lets see!
thats all i can say for now!

an Irish toast

John O'Reilly hoisted his beer and said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, between the legs of me wife!"


That won him the top prize at the pub for the best toast of the night!



He went home and told his wife, Mary, "I won the prize for the Best toast of the night"

She said, "Aye, did ye now. And what was your toast?"

John said, "Here's to spending the rest of me life, sitting in church beside me wife."



"Oh, that is very nice indeed, John!" Mary said.

The next day, Mary ran into one of John's drinking buddies on the street corner. The man chuckled leeringly and said, "John won the prize the other night at the pub with a toast about you, Mary."



She said, "Aye, he told me, and I was a bit surprised myself. You know, he's only been there twice in the last four years. Once he fell asleep, and the other time I had to pull him by the ears to make him come."

Andy on Enterprise Software

Andy on Enterprise Software

Mnemonic

Mirrors are liers.
they lie about everything. they tell you that you are good looking, they tell you that you are thin, they tell you what youwant to see, exactly like their commarades, the weighing machines. They lie as well, in this case however, they tell you that you ARE fat, and you really NEED to loose weight!
anyways, why this sudden take off on the mirror. this morning i had my moment of truth. the grim tragic truth. from about 10 feet from the mirror, i look dashingly handsome and well muscluared, however, on "closer" inspection, i look like a blob of fat. anywyas, the fat is so well "blobbed" that my stomach and chest looks exactly like homer simpsons face, now THAT is tragic. my gym has an over abundance of glass all over and which ever direction i look, i see a handsome me! now, that does make me feel good to a certain extent, as long as i am far away, but the closer i get, the uglier i get! so, the solution to the "problem", light travels faster and further. so stay far away. another intresting phenomenon, men gossip as much, if not more than women. god, its brutal, if there is a bunch of guys around, yak yak yak yak.... about anyihng under the sun. this i noticed during my work out sessions. everything from corruption to film news, to peoples lives to the quality of the weights. i mean for crying out loud, a weight HAS to be, a) heavy, b) heavy and c) heavy. what more can you discuss about a cast iron blob of metal? well, evidently, there IS a lot that can be discussed! :)
lessons of life!
:)

Rama Rama

Rama Rama

Horn-y!

well, the devious marketeers mind can think of any hook to catch the gulliable fish( Read:Customer) to try the goods. in this case, my devious mind thinks of the seven sins, and well, since you have reached till this line, i can assume my strategy has work. sadly, this has nothing to do with any of the seven sins, but more like the 8th sin. Being an irate bus driver.
i must tell you at this point of the kind gentleman, who's service to my company is his unique skill of driving a 40ft piece of metal like a 6ft rover mini. the best part is that he not only lives an illusion that the piece of metal, that is a 20tonne bus, is as small as a car, but also that he is driving a rally in traffic.
he achieves break neck speeds, (that is by breaking the innocent bystanders necks) by some craxzy ass rash driving, but also with his Horn. (now you know the story of the title)

I will call him the Arnold Schwarzenegger of horns.
He has a horn for every occassion and every situation.
But why Arnold Schwarzenegger? simply because in the Movie commando, he has a gun for every occasion.

Here is an MP5, ideal for cleaning teeth, combing hair and blowing off the earlobes of a person within a 70ft range.
Next on the shelf is a baretta 0.45, ideal for combating road rage, silincing irratating critters and mugging someone.

anyways, my gentleman bus driver, has a horn for every body. His body, her body, dead body, everybody!

First, the high pitched Air horn, for close combat: If its a 2 wheeler, or a bus within a 10 ft range. The range here is from my bus's front bumper to the driver of the condemed vehicle. consistent blowing gives everyone such a headache that they have to pull over to buy an asprin. the day it was fitted, i could swear that the driver wore a wicked smile seeing other drivers veer off near pharmacys. i on the other hand sitting right behind this maniac almost threw up due to the consistant badgering.

Next, the regular horn. tuned to the note C on a keyboard, however far far less pleasant, this is used as the standard equipment horn. red light turns to green, PHWEEEEE! Green light turns to red! PHWEEEEE!( Now, this is only if he bother to stop, i did however wonder why did he do that, was he displaying his displeausre at the signal, well, these are one of those GAKs, or God Alone Knows)

Incase there is a vehicle who is refusing to move from his path, there is the multi note horn, i suspect its tuned to C and A, does break across wavelenghts. The amplitude is also rather large as this is BLOODY loud. so, if he begings to loose his cool, in comes the MP5 of horns.

Now the mother of all horns, The OICW of horns ( Objective Individual Combat Weapon for the un initiated, it was a special weapons program by HK), the THREE tone horn, this is once he HAs lost his cool. now i would much rather not be around when he does blow it, and defninlty not in Front of the bloody bus, but this is saved for those rare occasions of Lboard dirives, and imcompetent nincompops. !

anyways, i am sure from past history our gentleman has a hidden stash of horns like grenades. he keeps replenshing his arsenal every now and then.
well, god do help those who cross his path, and refuse to give way, even if there is NO way to move, just move!
:)

OGiM

The day,

It commeth,

Like any other,

Knowing not,

The tragedy it bring-eth,

For it sets in the Sunday evening,

Bringing in the blues,

For that its Monday commeth,



Like no other day,

It banishes the weekend,

Like no other day,

It banishes the smile.

You wonder were the fun and frolic went,

To see no one with a smile.



You sit at your desk,

You wonder what to type,

Then you think and say,

Aah the three musketeers,

Joy they bring,

So I type a few words to thee all,



Have a great week ahead!

LuvBites

LuvBites

Monday'ers

Go yonder to the ‘ills,
To smell the fresh air,
My lungs, me love to fills,
Neither the dew, nor dusk,
Nor the tea with rusk,
Puts my thoughts,
Onto paying my bills.
For I am now,
Sitting at my desk,
Wondering how,
My weekend went,
But the task at hand, surviving with the band,
Of so called company frills!

The case of the blathering baboon.

I remember times when we used to see some serials that talk about animals, particularly monkeys, they used to show that monkeys, when they get agitated, they shriek... and a lot at that.

now, I think I found our link to our hairy, tailed, social predecessors.

its our security guards.
sometimes, I guess I can just stand back and marvel at the way they behave when the busses are coming in. The cacophony of the whistles, gives the exact semblance to the screeching of the monkeys in the cage.... khhheee .. kheee,,,, khee hhheeek hsskhskhehkekekeke ..

I guess roughly translates to.... "Hey dudes, check out that couple walking towards us, maybe we should act like them, .... no, why should we... look at those poor souls, trapped in a cage... not free like us.... noo... soo sad... HEY.. YOU TWO... HEY... COME HERE... YOU WANT SOME SNACKY SNACKY?... HEY.... they are not paying attention, ... obviously Moron,,... Only I, the smartest monkey around here.. Can talk... "Human"..... eeehhhmm... HEY, you foul smelling, ignoramus, potatohead, strange skined moron... get your ass here, before come there and make you.....

and from past experience... we just hear it as..... kkkhhheeee heeeeekkkhehe ekhekheeeheek ehekehekeheeeee ekheeeeeeeekeh ekhkee......
then, we as humans go, hmmm.. look at those cute monkeys, imagine if we could understand what they are saying. Lets take a picture...

well, the security guards, are just the same. The monkeys in the cage... the difference is...
monkeys who have the brains, don't have whistles, and I cant say the same for us homosapiens.

I have tried taxing my brains to wondering, why... WHY in the name do they whistle so so very often.... and I have come to just one conclusion.
its a male ego thing. "he who whistles the loudest at the biggest bus, is the bravest. Well.. alas... all is woe!!

my secret stash of biscuits.

In my draw!

watercoolers.

one of the things that they teach you in b-school is that the best place to find information is by the water cooler.
well, they teach you wrong. the only thing i find next to my watercooler is:
a) empty cans.
b) full cans.
c) a tub,
d) a sponge.
e) a bucket
and f) the water cooler itself.
and not to forget the fire exinguisher.
which i feel is rather redundant cause there is water and a bucket right there, why would someone want a fire exinguisher. this is all part of a large conspiracy by one of the large software companies to brain feed us with utter bunkum. who needs a fire extinguiser anyways? considering that a building is upto the hilt in firefighting equipment.

anywyas, who uses one. has anyone not heard of running away? the alarms are shrill enough to wake the dead, the living and the sleeping so i really feel they have done due diligance by ..... hang on... or....
what if these are empty.... hang on!
.
.
.
.
.
.
(that signifies time has gone by).
ok, these suckers are heavy, i dont think i am going to attempt to fire one of these to actually see if they have "stuff in them". what do you call it? fuel to fight fire?.... hmmm. dont think so, what if someone goes to "refuel" this suckers, and does literly that....
dangerously disastrous!

hmmmm.!
anyways, i got to get back to intellectually challenging things like staring at my screen appearing to be attemtpin to be doing work... but shh! i would not tell anyone that i am not! guess its nice to be in a company that has like a gazziliion people. no one knows, and no one cares!
:)

the attack of the keyboard!

the attack of the keyboard!

ineveitiably, there are bound to be a group of people in any organization who belive that their job is bring out the dirt of their companies.
well, im not one of them, so if you were expecting me to throw mud on "my beloved company" you are wrong. speaking of mud throwing, me thinks there is a rather sultry tone to it. WOW. As in Women on Wrestling or something to that effect, not too sure of what the "O" in the WOW is there for. i guess thats like a lot of things in life. you dont know why its there. there used to be a reason for stuff, thats why it was invented, but somewhere along the line, you loose the meaning of it, and then its just done. i would say its similar to getting up in the morning. why does one need to get up in the morning? i mean, why is the morning set as time the sun rises. why are we conditioned to behave the we are behaving? well, yeah, see, i told you, i dont have much work to do. i just come to office, space out, and when i actually do work, its for a rather short time. eveyrone around me is so busy, its nice to be able to just chill out and ....jsut chill out. period.

I guess we need to create the heriocs of something. let see, the heriocs of Werty. Why WERTY? well, in the keyboard, there is QWERTY, so a person with a name called QWERTY sounds rather QWERT-y, so WERTY sounds a cooler, funkier name.
The series is named The Adventures of WERTY.
Yeah, i think i will write something like that. the advantage is that Werty can take flight in imaginations, and not worry of the shackles of everyday life. :) i likes.

well folks, stay tuned for the ADVENTURES OF WERTY.